So badly do I want to be bad

So badly do I want to be bad

I want so badly to be bad

Why am I so soft
To be evil – apathy
But I sit back pathetic
I sit back easy
Watching – observing

But to be the beast
To rise - and take the feast
To let the fire burn
Watching the lemmings burn

To be the thief in the night
And not to worry
If what I did was right

Yet I’m left
Holding thorns – squeezing tight
Love and honesty – the constant fight
Honor loyalty – the flickering light

Like the moth trying to evolve
Wrapped in others lies
I can see it in your eyes
Thinking I believed you
I do think I tried
But constantly whipped by the cat o’nine
While dancing for you
I’m the puppet the pantomime

So badly do I want to be bad
To be the heartless one laughing
Rolling in the illusion of happiness

How badly do I want to be bad
Giving up on this delusion
This destiny this fate
Cancel it out
Snake eyes – crossed out
Lay the pennies on them
Take the last nail – sink it in
I will disappear – never to be seen again

Just fuck – I wanna be bad

Tired of rolling over – being a bitch
I’m feeling for a wound
Something to dig in
My fingers fingering – I’ve got a sudden itch

I’ll tear out the scars - I’ll drive off in my car
Screaming songs on the radio
Letting tears wash away – all the unused sins
Renounce the fears and begin